Wednesday, March 01, 2006

The Strange: An Official Compendium

Here, an exhaustive collection of the best we could come up with considering how hungover we are:

If Piracy Is Wrong, I Don’t Want To Be Right

Can You Stop Being a Communist For One Second?

You’ve Got To Hear This Album That Satan Recommended

It’s Not Easy Being the Only Half-Man/Half-Velociraptor in Town

Plausible Rock ‘N’ Roll Conversations (Bob Marley and Peter Tosh)

Let Us Incinerate Your Loved Ones

As Mayor of This Town, I Declare This Meal Delicious!

Do You Really Think That’s What Jesus Would Do?

The Wisdom of Led Zeppelin, With Commentary

When Visiting Southern Vermont, Stay at My Bed-and-Nothing

Oh, I’m Sorry—Did You Mistakenly Walk Into Our Well of Souls?

I Thought We Agreed to Never Speak About What Happened to Jenny

Things I Would Like to See (Part 4)

Do You Want to Know What Frightens Me?

You Are Utterly Ridiculous

You’re Going to Love My Laboratory

Things I Have Dropped As If They Were Hot (Because They Were)

I Might Have Killed a Nun, But You Raped a Horse

Your “Breakfast Meat Cornucopia” Is Profoundly Lacking

Relax: There’s No International Conspiracy

What’s Up, Vanilla?

Italian Dishes Yet to Be Exploited By High-End American Food Service

Memorandum From the Desk of M. Casper Humboldt, Executive Director (RE: Assimilation of New, Undead Personnel)

Welcome to Our Fraternal Organization

Where In the Goddamn Is My Hot Fudge?

Even the Midget Likes It

I Can’t Believe You Stole My Copy of The Anarchist Cookbook

Your Horror-Themed Tex-Mex Eatery is a Little Stupid

I’m Not That Criminally Insane

The Annual Davenport Family Newsletter